when u accidentally hurt ur friends feelings and they insist that its fine but u know it isnt
work it move that bitch crazy
phil dunphy is the type of parent i want to be
punning should be an olympic sport please hear me ancient greek gods and make it so
Well … well that’s just impressive.
looks like things i would design
the worst part about christmas is having to react to presents in front of everyone
When my sister was in the Marines some little shit told her to make him a sandwich so she went to his boss and they used money from the asshole’s next paycheck to order subs for the entire squadron
i deserve to be made out with and touched inappropriately right now goddammit
"where on earth have you been all day??"